I Haven’t Dropped Off the Face of the Earth…Yet.

I have been seriously MIA.  You know how sometimes, you just let everything consume you?  That’s where I’ve been.  

It’s that tricky place where you know you have a million things you should be doing, but you just can’t bring yourself to do any of them. You know that the longer you put them off, the worse you’ll feel, and yet, you just can’t do it.  Just me?  I’m sure it isn’t.  

The irony isn’t lost on me.  I did an entire week of posts talking about how to conquer stress and here I am, letting stress immobilize me.  Talk about needing to take your own advice, am I right?

Truthfully, I had an entirly different blog post planned out months ago.  I even started it. But then things in my personal life were thrown for a loop.  A very close family member has been dealing with a degenerative disease, and though that’s not my story to tell, I am beyond devastated about what this means for this person.  It is impossible to put into words what it feels like to watch someone you love struggle and even harder when you are powerless to stop it.  I am very much a “let’s come up with an answer” type of person, but when there are no answers, then what?  

On top of this we had some issues with Slugger that have since resolved themselves.  But for a moment there, I was seriously pulling my hair out.  Little people, little problems.  I’m starting to have no-so-little people and I’m so not equipped to handle life.  Recipe for disaster.  

We’ve also been house hunting like mad. On a super tight budget. In New Jersey. If that sounds fun to you, you’re probably the type of person who also enjoys a swift punch to the face.  Seriously.  They should make a game show out of finding a decent, affordable house in NJ.  No one would win.  But you would see some really weird stuff in the process.  

If this seems awkward and disjointed, that’s probably because it is.  I wanted to write something just explaining where I went off to, but it’s impossible to do so without it sounding like boring, tired excuses.  So for that I’m sorry.  I need to give myself a kick in the pants to carry on, and needed to put this out into the universe.  I’m hoping someone out here will hold me accountable.  Just be all “hey, why aren’t you doing life?”  For real.  Make me do things.  

This is me saying “help me get out of my own head”.  No shame.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help, right?  

Whew. OK. That’s enough.  I promise to be more interesting next time.  Thanks for hanging in there.  

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